I am sure it was “beat” into me at a young age and thus my brain learned to hide and then cope and then hide and then scream and then recoil etc etc etc. 

There are many theories as to who I am, why I am, etc. None of which are ever really declared as journeys more as being there while living each day, be present in ones own body in the bad and good. Many people look for this journey of enlightenment when in turn I think we just get everyday as a lesson and what we make of it. We can plan for tomorrow but tomorrow can change in an instant, thus wasting today.