My Self Summary

My profile is long, so if you are really pressed on time, message me, tell me about your day, and we can go from there. That or let’s just take a walk in the park (albeit it isn’t a polar vortex at the time).

My meyer’s Briggs is STFU.

I want someone in my life who has the same dedication as I do, so we can push each other and be the best versions of ourselves, FOR OURSELVES, together.

If you do want to know more here you go:

If you are looking for the guy who is mysterious, I may not be your choice, not because I am not good at keeping the intrigue going, keeping you on your toes, or being a “man”, but because I choose communication over fighting down the road over notions of “who I am with you” and “who I am with myself”. I can dress nice, I can grow a beard, I can also shave and look like a total bum. I am great with my hands, but also text faster than a jack rabbit, doing what jack rabbits do quickly. Perception really. Your wants at the time of reading this and my perception of what I want. Does that mean if we agree with each others profiles it is inception? *epic music here*

I observe the world around me intensely. I can totally chew gum and walk at the same time.

I guess I’m also supposed to tell you about how much I love life and like doing stuff and things. Something about sarcasm and friends and the city. Well, ok there ya go!

I believe finding yourself despite and in spite of societal infiltration is key to being 100% real, 100% authentic.

When it comes down to it, I need a challenge, not a game. One must be open to conversation and not afraid of debate as if it is confrontation. Laughter is a plus, even the awkward kind.

I come off as the little kid yelling “Mom, Mom Mom” still, but I’m just excited about most new things and people in my life. I’m really easy to talk to and can hold my own in a conversation and never struggle for something to talk about, hopefully you can contribute, although I can talk to myself too.

The most important thing to find in a another is someone who understands the risks of telling all, yet they do it anyway, because risk can kiss their ass.

I am 100% responsible for my 50% of the relationship, are you?

Spent a lot of time abroad; Zurich(a huge chunk of my childhood), Paris, London, Korea. Love the cultural difference out there. So much more to give right away with less stigma attached.

Btw I see a lot of “work in progress” written here.. believe it or not so is mine haha.

What I’m doing with my life

I’m a photographer and director.

Currently I shoot high fashion and dance. I love combining industry standards with the motion and energy of a professional dancer, be it a ballerina or contemporary.

It brings me back to my theatre major days where I was more comfortable in the green room than in a classroom.

I am convinced that the model world is backwards. The strength and beauty of the dancers I have worked with is out of this world. The energy alone they bring to a shoot is more than I could ever ask for. They really prove what I have always believed; that beauty is inside, passion, character, and hard work! This all equates to natural beauty, something overlooked too much in a Photoshop imbued world.

Photography to me is about capturing a moment in time filled with the emotion and character of the person in front of me. People often ask me “Is it fun to shoot pretty girls” and I always wince. That is not what photography is for me. Male, Female, young and old, it is so much about capturing an expression, a breadth of air, rather than just a pretty face. Working with people open to themselves and working to get them to open to me and an open space that is both scary and exhilarating, is why I shoot, it is why I am a photographer and director. It is that interaction that makes it fun. It is that hour of makeup and first look where I am more interested in getting to know you as much as possible to really be able to capture that moment, on that day, of who you are, that excites me. It is challenging and invigorating.

“The question about why I blur the lines between life and art… There is no job, there is just the art. There is no start at 9 we finish at 5, it is part of our life and everything we do without even trying moves without effort from the reality of our life, to the fiction of our art. And they do cross-fertilize and they do segue into each other.” – Baz Luhrmann

Oh this means I am a dance photographer and a director at the moment.(ask about my other moments if ya like) And my hours are not normal and at any given time I am thinking about my life and work simultaneously but still don’t let my work define who I am or the other way around. You can take a look at my work at if ya want.

(Need a better OkCupid profile pic? Hit me up, my friends already have haha). I also write and take random dance photos with people I shoot because it makes me feel like a badass.

Do the above things define me? Prolly not, I just make sure to wake up everyday and do ONE thing that I love. And there are many things I love.

Here stalk away

I’m really good at

– Not taking it all too seriously.

– Making you laugh, smile, and feel comfortable no matter the situation.

– Taking it a breath at a time while forgetting to breath.

– Thinking things out and actually acting on the conclusion.

– Writing my stream of consciousness to anyone and anywhere.

– Helping people get from one place to the next in life, through talking and my writing.

– Not being one of the cool kids.

– Observing the small things

-Hugs.. no seriously.. I am a pro

 (this was post desk job and pre get my ass into gear mode. So I still hug really well just a little less hug available for physical reasons 😛 )

The first things people usually notice about me

– Multitasking conversations and remembering when you ask “What were we talking about?”

– My first message is not nearly as exciting as my second!

– I use way to many freakin’ emoticons. 😛

– My hair, defies gravity and molds to any shape.

– I am actually 5’10 and don’t have Napoleon syndrome even if you were 6’2.

-How no matter what I do, every photo of me looks different, regardless that I am a photographer… and how fucking impossible it is to get my blue eyes to show in a 


 (yes I just hashtagged that shit..)

Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food

Waiting for House of Cards Season 3….

The six things I could never do without

Checking okcupid or tinder alerts during a first date

“Googling it” during a conversation

Ignoring phone calls to text the reply

Not making eye contact

Long drawn out messaging or texting before meeting

Messages about how it must be great to be a dancer.


…I’m doing this wrong….

(For those of you who don’t get it, perhaps my username is accurate and sarcasm just doesn’t play out well on these things)


– Multitasking conversations and remembering when you ask “What were we talking about?”
– My first message is not nearly as exciting as my second!
– I use way to many freakin’ emoticons. 😛
– My hair, defies gravity and molds to any shape.
– I am actually 5’10 and don’t have Napoleon syndrome even if you were 6’2.
-How no matter what I do, every photo of me looks different, regardless that I am a photographer… and how fucking impossible it is to get my blue eyes to show in a
(yes I just hashtagged that shit..)

Everyone always says music, but music has its own category for me. Music can make me calm, it can make me energetic, it can change my entire mood, it can make me cry, it can literally make me feel a season. But I am not talking about the Top 100. I am talking MUSIC. So if you too “like music”, that is good.

Oh and if you can sing, you have won my soul 😛

I spend a lot of time thinking about

Why so many people list humor and sarcasm in their profiles, is there an abundance of stiffs on here? Is it just our way of “smiling” through the pain in the ass of having to be on a dating site versus happily spooning right now? I mean I LIKE SARCASM AND HUMOR as much as the next person but for fucks sake that should not be something you can’t live without! Also if you understand sarcasm through texts… you are way more advanced than I am. Fucking 80’s. Basically everyone just wants a really dull clown without the makeup. Ugh I hate clowns. “It” ruined my childhood.

When my next meal is.(inner fatty)

What it would be like to be a scene kid….

What IS a scene kid exactly….

How the reflection in a subway window always makes you look awesome.

If you think you know my “type” from this profile.. and if I should say something like I am the 51st shade of grey to make me sound kinkier or more intriguing(ask for the story). If I should tell you about my nerdy side or the fact that I don’t actually have a cool side. If I should mention the Emmy to solidify my geek. Perhaps that I love to/and default to being in control, but secretly wish someone would take it. There is a ton I think about and more over love to share and get deep into until our eyes begin to close and we wake up and go to a diner in our now wrinkled clothes from the night before.

Why the culture of girls being raised on Disney’s ideal Prince Charming and guys the perfect internet porn star, it is no wonder the wires are so crossed half the time.

How we don’t have to meet at the pinnacle of perfection we just have to meet and be open to communication and understanding. Then if what ever interested us at our first “spark” is strong enough as we travel along our own life lines we will actually become two people who encourage and inspire one another.

On a typical Friday night I am

blah blah blah, a-typical, blah blah blah

The most private thing I’m willing to admit

Walls are for buildings. I am pretty open with what I share.

Otherwise we work so hard to break down the fictitious wall, by the time we get through, the rubble from yours has dropped and built up mine.

I truly believe if your heart is not bruised, cut, and bandaged by the time you meet the person you are meant to be with, you didn’t do it right. Have to be open to the bad to truly find the good.

Whoa tangent…

I suppose a good one would be… I really love the color pink and will do my best to live vicariously through the person I am with to fulfill that love.

You should message me if

I never thought I would say this, but “You want to”, many people have messaged or told me that guys react weird to girls messaging first… I am not a mind reader unless we “like each other”. So feel free to message me first or just like me, I won’t judge you haha. So weird. Online dating “rules”.

You know you and I are not perfect, but finding that balance of imperfections will be a really awesome moment.

You can look past my wall of text in this profile and understand this is just a moment of words, not a specific thing, person, type or ideal I want.

You think if a man cannot take a shirtless selfie, than a girl cannot take a finger mustache selfie…

You are emotionally available and value our memories over the ones we have already facebooked.

You agree this is a problem:

You understand that I don’t love you:

You aren’t the one making online dating complicated:

Your ideal first date is somewhere that doesn’t smell like piss and regret.

You realize I am not your ex-boyfriend and won’t treat me as such. As well even though I often make the perfect “first date” to go on with if you just broke up with a boyfriend, and you are actually not on here for dating, but you want company and need help sorting the massive mind fuck you and him created for one another, I am going to charge you per hour. I am here so I never have to be here ever again :P, organically, naturally, and with time of course.

If you can multitask thoughts, understand that I am not married to just one outcome of a conversation, and enjoy talking because it leads to… more talking. We should get along well. 🙂

P.S. Please be open to the idea of a Skype chat or FB(instagram whatever lol) friend request prior to meeting. I am tired of meeting people who picked their best pictures from 10 years prior. I am serious. Sure looks aren’t everything, but this is ONLINE dating, not SURPRISE I am actually 50.

Small disclaimer: I have zero tolerance for any sort of games that cause me to second guess if I should wait 1-3 days before calling. I don’t like to waste time, I am hungry for knowledge of those around me. This is the jaded sound of someone who has dealt with people afraid of getting to know each other but prefer holding onto the idea of “dating”. More than a text or two or the yearn to see you again, doesn’t mean I love you or am too serious. It just means I am excited to know more. Trust me, your first impression will NEVER be that amazing where I drop the rest of my life to attach myself to your hip. I enjoy my life too. Ok rant over.

Being allergic to animals would be a bad thing, I have two that are probably the sluttiest creatures I have ever met and if you ever meet them, they will want more time with you than me.

You love reading and want to read more about my thoughts:

What friends & family say about who would be a good match for me:
Someone who looks at life as Tristan does, with the same sense of humor and independent outlook. Also someone who is into fitness, but not too obsessed above all else. A good heart. A good friend. Adventurous. A person who easily laughs it off, but is not totally dependent on Tristan for their happiness. Someone who appreciates when a “guy” does a non-Mars thing.(he grew up with 5 sisters) Someone who accepts who they are and who Tristan is. Someone with a strong personality, that can be both intellectual but also street smart at times. They would be concerned with looking good but not obsessed in a superficial way. They would also need to have a similar sense of humor that could be open about things.