These are the cookie crumbs for my depreciating mind.

Month: April 2007

I’m lost

and I don’t know where to find myself or who I am or why I become it or where it derives from or how I created it.

I lay awake now lost unable to cry able to know the feeling unable to really feel though.

help me.

Myspace, Deviant Art, Or anything semi blog like…

Why do we all find the need to live in old pictures easier than new ones as we grow older? Perhaps it is a personal thing I have noticed, but I do see it with others too.. meh food for thought.

P.S. Why are they taken as a written law and misinterpreted so much? Because people cannot talk to one another without a myspace to hide behind so they are examined until they fall into the category of a famous poetry piece? Over analyzed until the true meaning is lost. Luckily people TALK to me cause I hardly check those places and things I post usually are more of an advertisement than a use as a blog.

Driving…

I remember driving down the spruce tree covered streets in NJ before my move here about a year ago. I remember the smells. I remember the people. I remember my car… I remember my music choices… I remember a lot… I’ll hold on to those memories.

What do I feel like doing?

I feel like putting on a pair of the highest definition headphones and getting lost in every kind of music there is. Currently I am listening to Celtic music on my Studio Monitors. mmmm If only I could carry them in my ears. I miss getting chills at broadway musicals.

I just felt like writing…

I just felt like writing tonight. I am not sure what I will write about.. hmm dammit a Christmas song just came on on my playlist. Don’t you hate when you are listening to music and a Christmas song you actually like comes on and you are now faced with the decision.. DO I LISTEN or DO I NOT due to it not being Christmas.. ahh decisions decisions. Well at least it provided me a way to get started with the writing here. To read more click the little thing below this:

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Accepting my Gamer Genes lol

So since I took the plunge into geekage totally I was an actor and well lets just say you do everything and anything to keep your figure pristine. Well, I kinda fell victim to comfort of not having to stand infront of an audience naked and well enjoy the finer foods more often such as Oreos, tostidos, redvines, etc etc. For a little bit I even fell victim to my previous past of smoking to try to keep the weight in check which worked well. However I traded a cancer stick for weight.. and well it didn’t weigh out lol.  So I went shopping this weekend and finally got some clothes to replace my skin tight jeans from my dancer days lol. Albeit it was a hard plunge to finally come to grips with but overall I feel better in clothes more fitting and well eventually one day I will find a tennis partner and hopefully get some of the sit on my ass all day in front of a computer weight to fall off. And thus is how my week began with new clothes! Has a girly moment lol.

/tickle tickle

When I tickle you you say HEYYYYYYYYY STOPPPP ITTTTTTT…. And when I smile with a devious smile and go.. “ok” all sarcasm attached you run to the corner of the room holding pillow in hand ready to swing! Your eyes jitter around the room… I sit there watching.. Waiting to pounce… still I sit in this empty chair, looking at that wall, wishing you were there. (THIS IS NOT EMO, read it in a CUTE tone)

/tickle

ooooo i tickled you.. You laughed… then you snorted… then you punched me.. then i rolled over onto you and we kissed. it was cute, wish you were there.

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