I like to skip the bullshit of trying to make the perfect first impression because then you end up getting to know someone else other than yourself. You spend so much time trying to perfect a moment that hasn’t even happened you forget to enjoy it and be yourself ultimately.
If you are open to yourself and can be open with me, I want to get to know you not based on finding the perfect outfit for a first date, and then canceling because you can’t, but on the person you are every day, which leads to better conversation and a more relaxed meeting.
I mean when you are old and I am sitting by you in a rocking chair yelling at the kids across the street or the fish in the ocean (depends on where we retire) do you think I give a shit what you wore the first time I met you? 🙂
Although, I will remember haha. I am weird like that.
You still get that “chase” feeling.
I actually find the allure of a chase boring but I do find allure in infatuation. Those first moments of meeting someone, waiting for the phone to ring, replaying the night in your head to every song you hear. I haven’t experienced that in a bit. There is a thoughtless highschool nights feeling to it, but not in that naive way, more in a hopeful way, and looking forward to each meet. Knowing there is something interesting to go to, see, meet, finding the person more and more attractive as time passes, seeing new parts of their insecurity or hearing new inflections and being able to be there with them.
Being able to share that really thick first layer of who I am very quickly, no stigmas meaning time or constraints. I can tell you everything in a conversation on a first meeting or over 3 dates, and you won’t think I want to marry you or I have nothing else to say. You will think, this is normal. This is how you talk to someone else. This is REAL.
So to share this way, you don’t lose that “chase feel” but you lose the “fake game” feel to it. You get anxious for the meet because of the idea that you are starting to burst from the inside out to spill those words “I love you” not in a perfect way or a hallmark moment, but in a messy, tear induced, vomit. Where your entire body will no longer let you keep it inside and knowing that now, NOW the real fun begins, because “love is not enough”.
P.S. Did you ever think the perfect you, is just that… you?