Lost in Txtlation

These are the cookie crumbs for my depreciating mind.

Month: August 2014

Worry about your #Selfie – Part 2

…Superficial… That word.

“not having or showing any depth of character or understanding”

So how does a little vanity mean you are not someone with character or understanding? I know you aren’t saying that I am ranting about the generalization. Too often people look at others as a one trick pony, with only one direction, personality, or one dimensional depth.

If our world had no glamorization, I suppose it could be a much easier place to find the perfect mental match in, however, the human mind is programmed to be attracted to certain aspects of the human body, a very part of the definition of superficial is built into our DNA. But it is also built to need care, comfort, and coddling.

So with that said, I have never thought a selfie was bad, well until it got its own category and name. There are moments where you feel good, you look good, and you want to capture it. Does the selfie define my insides? Nope. It defines my hair on that day and perhaps the #ootd (outfit of the day) haha.

For instance when I lost a ton of weight and started to feel better about myself not only surface level superficiality but physically as well, it was so much fun to share it with others.

Pictures to me mean more than just the definition or notion. A selfie can tell it’s own story about the inside as well. For instance, I have a rubber ducky in the basket behind me, a pink iPhone case, a semi organized bathroom, a tattoo, a red banana hanging, so you could come up with so much more than just the cleanliness of my mirror in the shots here.. but I think we would prefer to just jump on the mass media bandwagon like in so many cases poking fun at those around us labeling the #selfie as something that is “hurting” society, when I am actually very excite when someone has a ton of them. I can now see a little bit more of the bigger picture. A picture can only hide so much, but when you are the one hitting the button, I now know what you think is your “A” game and how you wish to represent yourself. Even if it is just a new outfit, I now have a sense of your style.

When I see someone’s Facebook for the first time, I scroll through the entire timeline as quickly as possible and you would be amazed at the story it can tell:

How you wish to be seen by the world
How you portray yourself to your family
How you act around your friends
How you act at work
What your hobbies are
Where you like to vacation or relax
How you smile, when you smile, if you smile

And so much more. My odd stupid power of being able to almost picture perfectly memorize a profile and dates of the pictures helps too haha. But regardless I say I am 100% pro “self picture”. If anything we get to look back and see what we looked like when we had hair. Our digital catalog is the plastic bound version of our parents scrap books and photo albums, so might as well fill them with things we can reminisce and/or laugh about.

I have written about this before actually, maybe this will be part 2: http://lostintxtlation.tumblr.com/post/73731846420/worry-about-your-selfie

What if we are the ones in jail

I read this in a book recently. The idea that we are stuck in a society, which itself may be the jail. The rules put upon us, the levels of threat we are alerted to, the regulations government deems fit, the taxes we pay.

But what if we break it down to a fundamental of human moral, Truth. We live in a society in which the truth is always one step out of our grasp. One can even assume that levels of the truth do not exist for any one person. Although we all put our trust in one person. That person being our president. But the presidency is made up of people and organizations. The president himself probably probes for the truth. He may have sat in that room the first day of his presidency where they revealed the secrets of the world to him, yet someone in the next room probably held their own secret which was passed to another office and so on. The secrets become a game of telephone. They change and fall far from the truth.

Our world is an evolution yet we have so many implementations of rules and governing ideals that are not updated to go with our evolution, because we are too busy trying to make the first set of rules work.

Technology itself is an example of how we have trouble keeping up with ourselves. An 85 year old man would look at an idea like twitter and laugh himself to sleep. Is it because we are not accustomed to knowing the world around us in truths, but snippets, and “Good Media”.

The introduction of money into any society causes there to be competition, often considered to be good, but also a key factor in changing the rules of engagement. This could be as simple as buying an apple at the market to launching an attack on foreign soil. So maybe we should put ourselves into the situations we often wonder the truth about. We should become soldiers… but a soldier will form his own truths from what he sees. What he sees may be part of the telephone game, where the people he encounters got the wrong message, skewing his truths off center.

So when do we get to know the truth, is it when we die and go to heaven we can look down and see all the answers? Or is it giving up on actively working toward the truth to fall into faith.

Faith gives us a chance to forget the truth and hope for a reality. It cleanses us from our own lies. Not to say faith is not helpful to bring the miracles within a person to the surface, but when as a nation we default to it 7 out of 10 times, you start to wonder if we are being passive with our own existence.

Under God we Trust, yet we will not trust the stranger next us, an embodiment of god, with our money, our families, or our well being.

When will we take an active role in our own lives, when will our questions or concerns, truly be answered? Does our own evolution stunt our ability to ask questions, because as they are asked they change in context?

We hold truth close to our hearts, we value it as a moral, yet we turn a shoulder when the lies are not prominently in front of us. We do not ask when they are not shown to be or are part of our lives; when the lies are a bill of congress not being updated with the times, or the times breaking a good bill of congress.

I often ask myself what it would be like to know the entire truth, and I often imagine it would hurt or turn me insane.

Would I rather go on living in this world which could be the “jail itself” as the author wrote, with my luxuries and comforts, or on the edge of insanity, everyday having to digest the truths of the world, the truths as they forge themselves in time.

CONVO SPARKED FROM IT:

  • Ben Our civilization requires methods of control to exist, but when they are placed in the hands of powerful men they are easily and often abused. I despise the finger pointing, pass the buck mentality our culture has, but I am not a powerful man with the ability to change it. All a person can do is live a life of personal responsibility. There is a lot of power in owning your mistakes. I drink because I like to get drunk, not because I’m controlled by beverage advertising. I’m overweight because I eat too much and exercise to little, not because McDonalds made me fat. I judge for myself what is correct (not right and wrong) based on my logic and my meager if ever increasing wisdom, not for the fear of an invisible parent figure that will spank me. Of course it’s impossible to ignore these entities’ influence on us, if only by the sheer volume of advertising and media proselytizing we are inundated with every day. However once we identify these methods of control, we can then choose to reject them. If I have anything it’s the knowledge I hold myself accountable to the personal code of honor by which I abide. Not God, not the government, not a mega-corporation. Most of the time they really only have as much control as you let them. You don’t have to buy what they’re selling. They all want a piece of our brain-space so they can define what is good and bad according to their own agenda. I’d rather answer to myself and advance my own. Anyway don’t worry, you’ll wake up tomorrow and this will all have been a dream.
  • Tristan G Pope You cannot make the statement that you are doing these things on your own, because break them down further, and you are working for the money to get the alcohol and the McDonalds. The work put in place to buy things, a simple thought placed into economy. But another idea started by a person expanded over generations unchecked to see if it still provides us with what we need to evolve. Or is it a grandiose statement to think we should evolve rather than sit and be content. Who’s to say we cannot be content with growth. Why was your hamburger 8 dollars? Why is your bottle service triple that of the alcohol store… Economy, Profit, etc. But like star trek, why is it so important to profit, if we can better ourselves and explore the possibilities of ourselves.

  • The problem I see is that one person says they choose for themselves, yet the things they choose are already in a regulated environment in which their own choice is not that of their own. As well why do the statistics of our country point to faith rather than pro-activeness. And does making your own choices against the grain of a very ingrained society hurt the choice of this very fragile existence we live, or merely a flicker of light or a twinkle of a star in the grand scheme of what we have made for ourselves. Not the “grand scheme” as if there is soo much more in the world to do and see and achieve and become but the “scheme” we have made for ourselves.

Sense of Adventure

It’s funny I was just talking about a “sense of adventure” with a friend. We determined that I do indeed have one(golf clap), but I consider my time very important these days and find myself less inclined to be adventurous with random people. I would rather people I really enjoy the company of be the ones I give my spare time to and then opt to be stranded on an island with. I could leave a situation but I would prefer to not have to worry about leaving, but camping out for awhile. While this contradicts the word “adventure”, it makes the actual adventure itself so much more fun, rather than just the preconceived notion.

I suffer from some sort of social anxiety, which is ironic since I am literally a social butterfly by nature. I graduated as a theatre major because I could see nothing else for my in my life than interacting with others and putting myself out there for all to see. I was making myself “google-able” before it even existed. It is my default to be expressive and outloud. I thrive the more people are around me and the more people I can put on a show for.

But along the way, my brain changed, my comfort changed, my chemistry changed. I developed the need to know if there was a bathroom where I was going, not because I need to use it but because it signifies the comforts I have in my own home. It represents the “safety-blanket” of a space I have made my own. And at first it was debilitating. I felt like I would never be able to be myself again and I was a broken fragment of myself, but over time I learned it, I adapted to it, and I conquered some of it. It will be a constant struggle but I am OK with it as long as I am learning and evolving with it.

I wasn’t always like this, shit I was always the first one out the door and last one in. I would jump before you could even suggest it. I used to consider my time wasted if I wasn’t out and about even if that meant me not enjoying my evening. One day it clicked that happiness isn’t about being out all the time but doing what feels good at the time you want it. Watch a movie instead of driving around a parking lot or going to the bar or vice versa. But forcing it to happen was my downfall back when. It is that “holiday” pressure. Let’s get blasted because it is New Years, always ended up in the toilet. Not my idea of how to start the New Year. I would rather just go anyday I feel like it. tangeeennttt…

So dating can often be a scary thing… First dates are not scary to me whatsoever, however. I know I can hold my own, I know I will be myself, I know if they don’t accept me for me, then it wasn’t meant to be.(mind you I am still learning how to self preserve) Sure I will be upset if they are a beautiful person and I don’t understand why they don’t like me back, but I can’t control that, I can’t be in everyone’s head(as much as I try by expressions and tonality). I am one of those people who would choose insanity, while being able to hear every thought of every person than to be naive and sane.

But ultimately I make sure I am the best version of myself that I can be, that includes telling people about my shitty day or good day when asked. I don’t have the mind space to have different personalities for people or situations. Sure I know what is socially acceptable behavior or not, but I choose to be the same “version” of myself to the best of my ability in every case.

On some of these dates I have been on I feel like I need to be more careful who I get stuck with and when. Because I think a lot of my anxiety is not about being in control but lack of control. I under estimate my own ability to leave a situation that doesn’t make me happy. I am slowly learning to navigate that. Instead of going to a happy place, I am facing it more head on and learning when I am going because I just don’t want to be somewhere or if I am trying to escape myself. I often feel like I will disappoint someone if I say no. Learning to balance my yes’s and no’s is still a struggle.

I am learning how to tell someone I would like to get to know them before doing some crazy adventure. Seems to be an online dating thing where your first message has to “amaze them” or your first date has to be “an adventure”.. if I met you in person it would be different because I could get a feel for you, but online, I want to at least meet you before the crazy fun begins! I blame this on the idea that online dating overloads you with so many options you are looking for someone to “best” the other person.

I like your face! I think…

I like your face!

I think…

So online dating has taught me something new, I have to be really critical of people’s faces. God, Tristan, you are so shallow!

Wait let me explain… So an online dating profile is comprised of 10 or so images of the person. First factor in: The person picked the photos they think best portray who they are, then take into consideration that you have different angles, lighting, and no actual three dimensional view of their face in these photos.

Let me first disclaimer this with: the beauty of these photos is obviously subjective to who is looking, what they like, what attracts them to another human being, and so forth. No one is being called out for being ugly, just for not fitting what I or another may be looking for or find attractive.

Ok now with that out of the way, let’s say you see one image you absolutely love. And you go, WOW. This person is gorgeous, I want to know more about her! Then you swipe to the right and see image 2, you brush it off because it doesn’t have the same effect but her ass looks great, swipe, swipe, swipe, swipe, same reaction but to different parts of her, except the face… But you don’t care, you know she is “gorgeous” in photo one and fits the physical criteria you have set. Wrong. You have become fixated on what you want the person to look like, not the overall.

I am a victim of this. Whether you have 3 images or 100, you can literally get so consumed by one shot that really plays to what you are looking for that you ignore the other images. You are not looking at the whole picture. I am a photographer, I understand angles, lighting, and makeup… yet even I find myself having to remind myself to look at the images together. If I am attracted to 10% of her face in photos, this is not going to work. When you meet in person you are going to essentially put together all those photos like a 3D printer would, piecing together a real person not a flat image.

It is so important to like 90% or more of someone’s face in their photos because they portray a complete picture of this person. They show their good and bad sides whether intentional or not. If you can feel connection from the bad sides and the good, the real life meet is going to blow your mind. You are going to be sitting there waiting for them to walk into whatever place you are meeting, and when they finally do, you are going to forget how to be cool and how to keep it together as you oogle them. Their eyes now having shine to them, their skin complexion, their hair motion… everything turns into a beautiful moving image, what people before online dating would have called real life.

I used to be so fixated on making sure someone took care of their body, wasn’t out of shape, and presented themselves truthfully, but I was so focused on that, I would often overlook the face. The face is the part that stays as you age, the eyes don’t change, the lips don’t change, etc. This is the most important part of the body(other than your mind, haters)! The part you see when you kiss, the part you see when you wake up, the part you look at while talking about your day, the part you wanna smoosh when they are being a doofus. (I do have a two face theory as well if you are interested: http://lostintxtlation.tumblr.com/post/74653633662/the-two-face-theory )

Don’t get me wrong I still think it is important to take care of your physical as much as you take care of your mental state of health, but the face is something we can literally forget about when it comes to online dating and seeing image after image of people, flicking through them like a deck of cards. You become numb to the details. But if I can offer any advice, it is that if you don’t feel with almost 100% confidence that you are attracted to someone’s face, don’t go on the date, delete the match. Sure you might have gotten along really well as friends, and sure someones mind and personality truly do makeup for more than 70% of attraction, and it is true, I have experienced the process of getting to know someone more and finding them more attractive the more I knew, but the face is so important, it tells so much of the story. So don’t sell yourself short. Even when I have felt that deeper connection with someone, I always loved their face in every photo, in person, and in general. The rest of the body be damned.

With online dating this is even more important because when you don’t have the ability to assess them through your sunglasses on the subway, understand the dimensions, feel that strange “connection” or “attraction” first hand, see them part their hair to the side of their face, and are just skimming through a bunch of “headshots” never getting to see them act or a reel, you really need to make sure you want to kiss them every day, for the rest of your life. I know, crazy talk, but I honestly believe it. This shit isn’t organic, so embrace it and perhaps you will have a better chance of not feeling disappointed by yourself for casting your own smoke and mirrors, just to get to the “date”. It is OK to say no and it is OK to be picky. There is something for everyone when it comes to what attracts us, so make sure you are looking for the right things. That is what I am trying to do, stumbling as I go, but learning each time I stumble. And just so I feel better about writing this outloud, no I am not “trying to hard”, I am literally just writing outloud how my brain works. This is me, for better or worse, I will think about forever after before I even meet someone, but I don’t go into it expecting a fairy tale ending, I let myself be, and through being, I take a step at a time, with many educated jumps ahead of me.

The Law of Relativity

I have heard before that this blog has helped people. Actually without a doubt, 99% of people who have read the list of links in “Love is Not Enough” in the menu above, have been able to separate from a bad relationship within 5 days of reading it. So what does that mean? Does that make me a “Life Coach”.. I don’t think so whatsoever. That someone related to something I wrote is a great bi-product of me writing this journal for myself with the intent of others reading. Sometimes you just need to hear the things you are thinking being said out loud by someone else. Nothing original, but something that you can relate to.

Today I heard this quote:

“Turning pro is a mindset. If we are struggling with fear, self-sabotage, procrastination, self-doubt, etc., the problem is, we’re thinking like amateurs. Amateurs don’t show up. Amateurs crap out. Amateurs let adversity defeat them. The pro thinks differently. He shows up, he does his work, he keeps on truckin’, no matter what.”

~Steven Pressfield

Of course it is a mindset. Everything we do is 90% mind and 10% body. It is also being able to navigate the past in a healthy way or at all. The groundwork of our being was laid down as children and for some that fear, procrastination, self sabotage, etc may be due to repressed memories, abuse, a bad childhood, a good one even, the way they were taught, morals, rebellion. The important part of this quote is missing… The part where it tells you it is OK to have these fears and not be called names. “Pro vs Amateur”  It is the journey and the courage to address these hurdles and learn how to navigate them to be a “professional” that should be celebrated. Anyone can tell someone they know HOW to get somewhere, but not everyone can hold their hand when they don’t or give them a lift to help them reach it.

Imagine if Einstein just told people, “Because it is the law of relativity”. And he NEVER explained it. The explanation in this case however is literally burned into our subconscious, being, brains, all bi-products of things we may not even remember happening. The embarrassing 8th grade school dance, the great feeling when we got our 50th touchdown in highschool, the way the family dog licked our face when we were 3. But we don’t get Einstein to give us a brilliant revelation to our issues, we are just faced with ourselves, our own exploration, and our own walls.

I want to repeat, ANYONE can say, “if you do something, it has been done”. But the hard part is we need to learn how to navigate things that have nothing, yet everything to do with the end result to even get it done in the first place.

Heated (fiction)

I am sitting on the edge of the bed lighting the last candle. The power has been out for at least an hour and the room has become humid as the summer pushes past the last remnants of cool air that was already struggling to fill each room in my city flat. The perspiration on my neck starts to fall down my chest underneath my buttoned down black shirt as I lean back from the candle, light flickering against the walls. I notice a shadow fill the dimly lit space and feel a soft pressure on my back as my girlfriend, who was in the bathroom room lighting more candles, pushes up behind me, her hands pass by my periphery as they warp around the front of me. Her chest is warm and soft on my back, her hands skillfully running up each bottom to the top of my shirt, teasing my senses, her mouth blowing lightly on my neck, cooling me for a moment. In that same instance she pops the top button of my shirt and puts her lips to my ear. I shiver in a moment filled with heat.

Her one hand is popping each button in a rhythm that makes me wild, while her other hand has slowly pushed down my chest to the waist where she is pulling my shirt out of my pants. The opposing motions keep me guessing for each moment. My shirt is sticking to me, the room is filled with heat and emotional intensity. I sit there, posture straight, pushing slightly back to feel her body against mine, trying to make out every since bit of her through my shirt and her silky black dress she was wearing that night when we went out. The familiarity of each bit of her makes me more excited, but only seeing it in a flickering candles shadow, creates what can only be described as a dream. As she gets to the last button her other hand already has the shirt pulled away from my skin and pinning my arms back behind me as she begins to take it off, but intentionally stopping short, running both hands over my chest. They slide smoothly from my collar bone to my pant line, pushing slightly into my pants, but returning back up my chest, finding enough grip to pinch both my nipples hard enough to make the sweat falling down my body to falter for a moment and my entire body, every pore, clenches. I let out a moan of pleasure involuntary…

I can feel her breath on my ear as she stays close to it, licking, and breathing into it sporadically but with clear intention. I am so turned on and alert, I am able to break free of my own shirts grasp enough to put both my arms around the small part of her waist, pull her closer to me with a firm grasp, and stand straight up forcing her to stand with me. I turn around locking her eyes, my shirt sliding to the floor. The power being out in the entire city, allows for every fold of the shirt to be heard as it hits the old wood floor. Her eyes are sparkling with the candles flickering all over the room, as if they are dancing to the beat of our hearts as they beat loudly.

I immediately drop to my knees and take advantage of the fact that her position behind me has lifted her dress above her panties. I put both my hands right above her ass to give her stability from the rapid turn and slowly push my mouth against her panties, exactly on the right spot, I kiss, breath, and inhale her. I stay there long enough for her to start squirming, my hands fighting to keep her still, but feeling every muscle when it tensens, the humidity making her dress feel non existent as my hands try to decipher if I am holding skin or the illusion of it. I tilt my eyes up to her, hers are darting around the room and I wait for them to catch mine. Immediately I move my hands under the slightly still draped dress and in a quick motion stand up pulling the dress over her head. As her hands are forced upright, I kiss her sides, arms, and then her neck. As i remove her dress completely, I leave it slightly wrapped on her arms as I finish up on her neck, moving my mouth right in front of hers. The stutters in her breath and mine from every sensation cause us to yearn for that final push to touch our lips together and take in one another. Instead I remove her dress and finally can hear the shower in the background. She must have turned it on when she was in the bathroom. A breeze from the open window pushes through the cold water and against our exposed skin. Her eyes are pleading with mine to make the final push to her mouth, but I continue to pull away slightly every time we are about to meet. She breathes out while stumbling the breath itself. I drop her dress to the bed and push my body and mouth past the side of her face as I slightly lick her ear, now moving my body toward the promise of the cold water falling from the shower. I get half way across the room before she is able to turn and see where I am going.

As I walk, I undo my belt, dropping it to the floor, then my pants, and lastly my underwear in an almost complete motion. I notice the candles all over the bathroom, like a scene out of the most romantic movies right before I move straight into the streams of cold water falling from the shower. The sensations overwhelm me because my body is filled with heat.

She, watching this all unfold stumbles with her bra for the first time in her life and dropping her panties just by walking toward where I have disappeared behind the bathroom wall. By the time she gets to the shower, her bra is still on and I reach for her hand and pull her into the cold stream of water with me. Instead of standing, I pull her close to me and slowly we both sit in the porcelain bathtub as cool water streams from above. She is sitting in front of me and I behind her. I wrap my hands around her breasts grabbing the front clasp as it snaps free and springs to the sides as the water falls down her face to her nipples all the way to her groan. She stumbles for her breath as the cold water shocks her system and my hands hold onto her tightly protecting her from the cold waters intensified stream, warming her body with mine, water filling our mouths, falling out over our bodies as we both try to breath in this constant flow of cold meets our sweating and heated bodies. She slides up and down my body trying to get closer to me, the sensations arouse me beyond what I thought was possible. She can feel every part of me and it makes her move more intently. My hands cannot let go of her, but struggle for traction on our wet bodies, making each motion much more grandiose and grasp firm.

We stay like this for what seems like an hour or so, our lips slide across each others as she turns back toward me simultaneously equalizing our bodies to a cool temperature, but filled with the heat of the moment. She reaches forward and with a flick of her hand the water stops falling. I can hear the last drops hit the hard surface of the shower floor. She stands as I watch her body glisten against the many candles as each droplet of water falls onto me. I want to lick every part of her body as if she were a cold glass of water on this extremely heated day.

She walks out of the shower ignoring the towels neatly placed on the racks and moves over to the large window that extends from the floor to the ceiling. A window that is reminiscent of something in a romantic Paris hotel. Outside the streets are dark, the buildings are silhouetted against the full red hazed moon. A rustle of activity can be heard outside as people are unable to sleep in this weather without power, moving to their stoops in hopes for a cool breeze of relief. She just stands there creating a pool of water on the floor underneath her.

I stand up from the floor of the shower and move toward her,  can make out the hairs on the back of her neck start to stand up slightly from the occasional candle lights gaze. It is guiding me to her. She knows I am close. I push my soaked body against hers and she pushes up against the cold glass on the window, reaches behind her, and grabs me with a firm grip, precisely lining me up with what is about to be pure bliss. I, unable to contain myself, as she pulls and places, push exactly at the right time and we are connected, feeling the heat of her surround me. I almost leave my body for a moment and watch as it transpires. Our two silhouettes backlit by the warm light of the cool moonlight. Our backs are contracting, flexing, and bending the candlelight as the water drops mixed with perspiration fall to the floor from each movement. Our motions constant and intense.  

As if I was shocked back to life from a near death experience I am pulled back into my body as I feel her squeezing around me, closing the gap between our bodies through instinct, tightening, contracting, the inside of her body pulling on mine. I am moaning loudly as I no longer have control over any of my body and hers is shaking on mine. Wave after wave of pleasure passes through us both as our bodies naturally compliment one another. Pulling and pushing what we need, until we finally explode falling backwards onto the bed in a release, still unable to separate our bodies. Our muscles are still having rolling intensities, our heads turned toward each other as we lock lips through the remainder of this amazing orgasm. Right as it feels like it is starting to subside, the sounds of the city coming back alive fills the air, the electricity of the moment and the world starts to turn back on. The air conditioner begins to push cold air over our bodies as we lay naked inside one another. We laugh slightly as the lights flicker back on to full and we see the clothes all around the room and the bed sheets covered in a dark shadow from our soaked bodies. We fall asleep, lips touching, cool air once again caressing our bodies.

The world…

So Extremists believe you are paving the path to the next world in this one yet I read of a boy marrying a woman and having a child right before a suicide run in battle. How do they explain birth If life is after death. The ISIS propaganda is well organized, mainstreamed, and intense. And I sit here shaking my head because we were lucky enough to be given life yet we are dumb enough to waste it. It upsets me. And it is also scary that while that begins forming what could be an extremely substantial army, other countries including our own are at war with one another be it territory, race, a job promotion, or a 2$ toaster on Black Friday. When I was told to grow up as a child by my parents when I was a kid, I don’t think this is what they meant. I believe in love, be it for myself or others and this only makes me believe in it more. Because like every generation there is a looming apocalyptic war around the corner, and it is tiring and heartbreaking. We may be an anomaly to this world or we may be brought in by some divine power… Either way it was a precious gift, one being wasted on so much blood and greed and power struggles. It is in our nature to compete but we also have powerful brains… Brains that you would think understand when the competition needs to end.

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